The Hole I Crawled Out Of

I've had nothing to write about here for days.  I vacillate between forcing myself and not giving a shit.

Mostly I don't give a shit.

Just writing random, half-assed shit on my other blog.  Whatever catches my eye kinda thing.  Just to get away from my "stow-reh," as old southern ladies say when referring to soap operas.  My stow-reh just happens to be a little less scandalous and a lot more geeek-o-rific than Days.  Shut up.  Everybody knows Hope and Bo.

Is it okay to mix Kabbalah and Hinduism and Christianity and Islam and jumble it all together in a story about a universal soldier fighting for his own planet's freedom of religion even though he knows there exists irrefutable proof that there is no god?

I hope so.

Because I'm doing it.

Alongside my poor, lost, kidnapped soul-turned-soon-to-be-actress in a snuff film.

Holy monkeys and spidershit, batman!

My brain hurts. 

I tried to run this morning.

My leg thought it was a pretty shitty idea.

I went into the living room and hung my head in sorrow.

Tried to go kayaking yesterday.

My torn biceps thought it was a pretty shitty idea.

I came home and took a shower.

Sarge threw open the bathroom door and hollered, "I see your vajayJAY!"

Hmph.
Well. 
He did.
After all.

But anyway.

Random truth.  I find nothing interesting about Marilyn Monroe and it makes me cringe to see people quoting her.  She’s a trailer park queen who discovered corsets, hair bleach, red lipstick, and that you get whatever you want by shaking your shit in front of a camera.   I can think of plenty much more quotable and much less useless women.


I mean, shit.  You can quote me and already be shoulders above Norma Jean.

I also think Jackie O. is ugly.  Her eyes are too far apart.  And she's mousy.  And shamefully docile.

There has to exist a respectable woman between the two somewhere on this planet.

Ooooh, HEY!  Look who just showed up to the party.

You wanna ROCK?!

Only I have the balls to claim I am more awesome than both Marilyn and Jackie O.   Even with a busted body riddled with breakage and tearage and .... just.... age.




Anyway.

Fuck all y'all.

I got shit to do.