RGG-11 Hilarity Ensues!

When does it not when Sarge and I are around?

We took the yaks on the ocean yesterday for the first time.  It had been a few weekends since they'd seen water at all due to weather, the Army, and life in general.  We were both itching for a paddle, so we got up yesterday morning and drove east until the road ended.  Here was my original plan:  

 Of course, getting from A to B up there in the corner was a little less than 2 hours.  So naturally, with my goddess guns (see goddess guns below):

......... I figured we'd make it to the Bahamas in a couple hours tops, right?  

Okay, I'm just yankin' yer chain.  I mean, don't get me wrong.  I could have easily paddled to the Bahamas, or even Bermuda, no problem.  But I didn't wanna leave Sarge behind.  You know.  I wouldn't want him to feel inadequate or anything, so I hung back a little and chilled with him quite safely in the Intercoastal Waterway: 

 Here's a picture from "O"

You see how beautiful and serene our day began?  This picture was taken about 5 minutes before a speedboat flew by and almost knocked me over.  It was at that point that I realized the ocean was a little different than blackwater ponds with pretty lily pads.  No shit, right?  

Here's a picture from "X"

 

We talked about how Myrtle Beach was a million times better than snooty old Wilmington.  We didn't see a single restaurant one must enter through an outer facade fashioned as a gigantic shark's mouth.  Nor did we see nary a surf shop with a neon sign.  No pink flamingos.  Just a bunch of snooty shit.  BORING.  

We found the best shade tree in the world.  

I ran and dived into the ocean and got myself all wet.  

I sliced my finger while trying to reach into an oyster bed under my kayak.  And then I freaked out that I was going to get necrotizing fasciitis like that one girl, so I went into survival mode and cleaned my finger with my contact solution and wrapped it in a piece of a plastic grocery bag.  I was totally JUST LIKE BEAR GRYLLS!!

Okay, no I wasn't.  

So anyway, the only thing we did not talk about was that little inconspicuous cloud of a darker color in the top right corner of the "X" picture up there.  

Which decided to open up and empty its bladder upon our little heads as we paddled back to the put-in.   Which really just made for a kickass paddle across the waterway, complete with paddling against the current while speedboats continued to fly by, the waves of which were constantly threatening to push us into the oyster beds which were now visible above the water since the tide went down at least 3 or 4 feet since we started.  

IT WAS AWESOME!!

And if you cannot tell, this post is yet another in my continuing saga of only writing about shit I CAN do..... as opposed to complaining about shit I CANNOT DO.... (like, running on a tibial stress fracture, which makes me wanna cry, but I am totally not gonna talk about that!)

I'm thinking about getting a bike (bicycle).  Maybe it will keep me from losing my mind while I am busy swallowing my pride and not allowing myself to run for a whole 4-6 weeks? 

There is still the tiny voice of an insolent little girl whispering to me that she will still be running a half-marathon on October 21st.  Regardless of bones.  No matter what.  That insolent girl will destroy her body for a half-marathon.  I know she will.