March 21, 2011
I used to live in South Korea. A couple of times, actually. I didn't live in Seoul or any other big city. I lived in a small village. There was a little farm on the path that led up a hill to our apartment. I woke up in the morning to rooster calls. Small village.
My landlord was a lady named Ana. She loved my boys, especially Andrew because he would eat ANYTHING. So, she'd always come get him when it was lunch time so he could have lunch with her. So sweet.
Jake would only eat chicken fingers and french fries. He still only eats chicken fingers and french fries.
I'd go over to Ms. Ana's house and we would sit on the floor with tea and talk. She'd tell me about her sister who was married to an American soldier and lived in Colorado. I'd tell her about my sister who lived in Okinawa, and my momma, and those kinds of things.
She lived in a 1 room apartment. Not 1 bedroom, 1 room. She had a chest of drawers, a typical Korean bed, a small kitchenette, and a TV. And that was pretty much it.
One day, I finally got up the nerve to ask her the question I'd always wanted to. "Don't you ever wish you lived in America where they have big houses and grocery stores?"
Gimme a break. I was young and dumb. I know there are big houses and grocery stores in South Korea. Just not anywhere we lived.
She obliged me, though. She wasn't offended. And she answered my question.
She said no. America is too busy. Too many big things and big voices and big places. South Korea is my home, she said. Why do I need a big, fancy house? I love my house, she said. Why do I need a grocery store or Wal-Mart or a mall? I have everything I need in walking distance. South Korea is my home, she said. Her home.
Interestingly enough, I never felt homesick for my home while I was there. Not even the first time, when I was only 17.
The only time I ever felt homesick were the times we had to leave. And I still miss that damn place. Tiny apartment, roosters, running out of hot water, hanging my clothes on a clothes line. I miss all of it.
It's such a little thing. Almost insignificant really. But I was an "army wife," constantly bombarded with patriotism in ridiculous excess and chest-beating and flag-flying. So many messages that America is the sparkling pot at the end of the rainbow. It's where all the popular kids live. It's the club everyone wants to join. My eyes and my heart were opened so much more that day. Your home shouldn't be where things are shiny and big and convenient and expensive. Your home should be where your soul lives.
* This is my contribution to Studio 30+ weekly writing prompt- Irony. Yay! (you're supposed to clap, damn it)
13 minions who have sucked on my crap:
Well done indeed.
Jake rocks, BTW.
A-to the-Men, Sister!
It's so true. It's why I refer to the UK as a home even though I only lived there for about a month a year for half a dozen years.
*Smiles* "Your home should be where your soul lives. Perfect.
I've heard it said, American's live so large they don't know contentment. It's never about things or even places, it's about finding contentment wherever you are/ with whatever you have. (Hugs)Indigo
This was a great post. Loved it.
And I have one kid who is still stuck in the chicken strips and fries food group.
Love the post. Home is where the heart is. I often think of building a cabin in the woods and live like "Little House in the Big Woods".
I'm clapping! I'm clapping! :)
This made me long for the summers I spent in a very small town just outside of Monterrey. Everything was simpler and slower and people were nice.
I think we all look back on a time when things seemed not so complex.
When I was first married, we lived in a trailer at the edge of the Croatan forest. It was amazing, except for the time we threw out week- old charcoal briquettes and they caught the edge of the forest on fire. Well, we were just married infants. I sure hope my kids don't do that.
Now I live in a subdivision-actually the second one I've bought a house in...and I am totally happy with my lifestyle choice. It's not fancy- just working people. Quiet about 90 percent of the time. I do get slightly annoyed by the use of lawn mowing as a recreational activity. I like to go outside and just start the lawn mower, turn it off and walk back in the house to watch people stream out and start mowing in unison. Yeah, I love to toy with the herd mentality. Same reason I like to go in Kroger and say loudly to my husband, "Look at this ham!" so that six other people will come over thinking it's the best bargain ever. People crack me up.
Anyway, we live in a suburb of the second largest city in the Appalachian region. About 700,000 in the larger metro area (5 counties). Yet, I still get really tickled when people from outlying areas think they are coming to the "big city."
I don't mind "big" at all. I do mind nasty, crime-ridden, etc. I have never figured out why two cities of the same size will vary so drastically in the severity of these societal ills. I don't think money has everything to do with it.
Convenience is NICE. I don't eat out a lot. I don't shop a lot. My kids love to play outside and play board/card games as well as video games. BUT I like having the options. I like knowing that I do not have to buy stuff at Wal-Mart because it is one among many. A broke chick can do a lot in a built-up area (and university town-you have to have guess where I am now) for entertainment. The parks, libraries and museums here make a staycation a very attractive option.
And last but not least, I cannot imagine spending gas to drive an hour to work one way or 10 or 20 miles to shopping.
Many of my neighbors moved here from up North and Florida and I completely get why.
It would be amazing to live in Korea for a little while, especially since I studied Taekwondo for several years, LOL. Oddly, we have a neighborhood rooster. Most mornings he can be spotted strutting around someone's yard. And he will not shut the hell up.
@ Barb- Yes, yes. I live in a nice little cozy subdivision, too. I try to exert my independence by using bamboo blinds instead of the white plastic ones everyone else has. And not cutting my grass until the townsfolk surround my house with pitchforks. I tried in vain to convince sarge to retire in Korea, but no. He's too in love with big trucks and big TV sets. The one thing I would really love is if towns were still small enough to walk everywhere. Everything seems so spread out in the states. That would seriously help with the gas problems, ya know. I'd love to see more bikes and groceries in wagons. I can live like that.
That was great! I really think a lot of people don't appreciate things we have here unless they see other places, too. We have a rooster not far from my house that I can hear sometimes when I take my dog out. He crows at the strangest times. I think it's a retarded rooster. :)
As a foreigner on temporary stay in the States, I'd say there are plenty of things to like about this country and that I will have left a part of my soul here once I'm gone, for very personal reasons. Like I left a part of my soul in a certain city in the UK four years ago.
International experiences are something to be truly grateful about. And can become as necessary as breathing.
wonderful post. I am form south Africa, and I so relate to the it's too busy, too big, too materialistic, too... greedy.
Having traveled a lot, I also never felt homesick for my country. I loved exploring and becoming a part of another country. The country I loved most especially was Puckett, Thailand. Would go back in a heartbeat.
I could see feeling like that, although I've never lived anywhere like that.
I had cousins that were horribly poor and I would spend the day at their houses in the summer...it just seemed like they were so much more free than us. I hated going there but then I hated leaving.
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